Saturday 25^th June – already we have a petition for another referendum in which ‘remain group’ hope to reverse the decision. Maybe it confirms the belief that the UK is no longer democratic or perhaps it’s the best of three. It’s not often I quote Ken Livingstone but one thing he said springs to mind as the repercussions of Brexit reverberate.

If voting changed anything they’d abolish it

Never a truer word.  Maybe the ‘remain’ group want to use the EU approach. Keep voting until you get the result the EU requires! Many of those signing and marching are youngsters who wish to remain in the EU. Perhaps they haven’t heard that nothing has changed yet. They can leave for Europe tomorrow – freedom of movement still exists. It will be interesting to see which European country is next to demand a referendum. Perhaps the USA should take note. When the people at the bottom of the heap finally decide they have had enough the result becomes unpredictable. Fear The Donald! We must ask Obama if we’re still at the end of the queue as he stated or has the special relationship a la Bush/Blair been resurrected? We hope not since we’re not in shape for another war.

    Sunday 26^th June – thank heavens for normality as London celebrates gay pride week. Rainbow flags have brightened up a dismal week and a comment heard, ‘what referendum’, put the world back in perspective. A minor note of confusion arose. Those of us who are not team members, read of tours being organized at the Victorian & Albert Museum. The subject matter made sense as it explores gender and sexual identities through a selection of related objects in the V&A’s rich collections. The objects were identified as LBGTQ. That was when we got confused. Q = queer. Any ideas who or what carries that definition? And to aid the celebration, rainbow toast is available courtesy of travelling ‘toastie’ van Grill My Cheese. In the face of this, how can the media keep talking referendum?

    A bit of good science learned this week. Toast is better than bread. Most of our crowd are avid toast fans and we just found out why. When toasted, bread goes through a Maillard reaction. Most of you know that, but for the couple that did not know, the Maillard process is a reaction between amino acids and sugar in the bread. This produces furanones that create a caramel-y flavour. So the taste improves. As a connoisseur, I would add that if you soak the toast in real butter the science becomes immaterial.  

    Monday 27^th June - Ramygala in Lithuania held its annual goat beauty pageant on Sunday. The contest winner was a 16-month old female. She beat five other contestants. The six goats were paraded on a red carpet that changed colour as the contest progressed and the goats passed their views on being paraded. A number of sheep farmers attended the event, their concensus being that sheep are generally better looking!  

    The new Top Gear continues to go down the pan. It just doesn’t work. Replays of the original are running every day on digital channels so there is no respite from comparisons. The new series is due to start filming in September so decisions about its future must soon be on the table. Will the BBC have the courage to bite the bullet? We doubt it since they get their funds as of right from the despairing public.

    Watched Glastonbury from the comfort of the sofa, the only mud a bit I picked up in the garden earlier. We don’t often envy the young but the atmosphere at Glasto must have been great. When Adele isn’t singing her language reminds me of blokes I worked alongside at a steelworks in my youth. No airs and graces, what you see is what you get, but what a voice? She’ll become timeless like Ella, Dinah Washington, Peggy Lee – listened to long after she’s gone.

    Tuesday 28^th June – Jamie Oliver has entered the post Brexit fray. He says that if Boris Johnson becomes Prime Minister he will leave the UK. If he’d said it earlier the ‘Leaves’ would have won by a landslide!

    The apocalypse is with us as the media blares forth about the drop in the pound and share values. Is our life as we know it about to end? Since we’ve seen similar happenings more than once during our lifetime we’ve decided not to panic. If we last long enough, we’ll reflect on the FTSE in 12 months time. If it’s around 6100/6200 where it has sat for about a year it might suggest that the world didn’t end after all. It probably won’t make the news then. In the meantime, if you have any spare cash, there has never been a better time to snap up some bargains.

    We only blog once a week as a rule and don’t plan to change. However, yesterday generated a great deal of chat on the phone and in the pub. And since everyone is an expert we decided to add our thoughts to the mix. We promise not to go daily unless demand insists – take that sentence to confirm that our sense of humour hasn’t been damaged by the referendum. Before we broke for another well-earned lunch, four of us had been viewing jewellery at a local auction and with gold likely to soar in price, bling could be a safe haven. With advice like this maybe we should be running the country! On reflection, we’ve always believed we could do a better job than most of our politicians.

    Friday 24^th June – Who’d have thought it? Guess the main topic of conversation over lunch at The Boot in Shipton Bellinger today? (good food and lovely people by the way) We’re out and Dave is history. You could have got decent odds on that as a double with any bookmaker at ten o’clock last night. We tend to believe the bookies more than the pollsters and they’re not often wrong. But both them and The City were way out last night. So how did it come about? Well, the ‘metropolitan bubble’ finally burst, confirming how far out of touch London is with most of the people in the country. The map showing voting patterns in England could not have been more clear, London and its outskirts heavily in favour of ‘Remain’, while most of England sat firmly against. As messages to politicians go, it couldn’t be stronger.

    We’ve said for a while that this vote was about immigration. Not in a racist sense but purely about numbers. The numbers entering the country is too high. No government could plan to assimilate that many people. Our services are badly stretched right now and a continued flood will eventually break them. This is logic not racism. And then there was the strategy chosen by Dave and his remain team.

    Apocalyptic threats are never the best way to influence the British. Push them hard enough and they tend to fight. So Cameron and his merry men used the wrong levers in their attempts to win this battle. They wheeled out elite experts to lead the charge. These are people who have comfortable lives that would never feel ill effects from anything Brussels introduces, many earning a significant crust from their EU relationships. Most of the threatened had never heard of the majority of the experts who told them they would lose pensions, pay higher mortgages, damage the NHS. The reaction of the average person was predictable. They dug in their heels and raised two fingers, and not in the Churchill manner.

    The aim of the EU has long been a federation of European States. Nothing could be clearer. We can’t believe the UK would ever have joined that. So as closer union occurred we would inevitably have been outside looking in. We have now taken that position by choice. Now is the time for the negotiators. Cameron patently failed to achieve change while swearing he had. That will no longer be acceptable. Party politics should be shelved in order to pick the best team available. Their party colours are unimportant compared to their ability to do deals. Put the best of the best in play and accept that win-win deals are essential for Europe as well as the UK.

    Here endeth the lesson. Oldgits 108:1-76 

    Friday 17^th June – it had to happen. Jamie Shupe, who has male biology and female traits, has won a ruling in an Oregon court to become the first genderless person in the USA. The 52-year old says that being referred to as male or female is not her, hence the choice of Jamie as an interchangeable name. She now considers herself as a third sex, a ‘counterpart’ our preferred term. No problems for Jamie with queues outside the ‘Ladies’ any more. It gives a whole new meaning to ‘Pick & Mix’!

    Saturday 18^th June – the ‘Remain’ team seem to be panicking. They’ve identified that pensioners are more likely to vote ‘out’ and have come up with an idea to influence the oldies. www.callyournan.com is the latest campaign. They are urging youngsters to call their grandmothers to try to influence their votes. In case the youngsters can’t think of the words to use the website even provides a script! I can barely wait for the kids to call me. I’m considering setting up a website called www.goodbyeinheritance.com to see if that has influence. 

    Sunday 19^th June – Christian groups have released a EU referendum prayer.  It plays it straight down the middle, but both sides will probably be in church today sending different messages upwards. We say upwards, but like much of the data on the referendum, it’s just a forecast. The big church names – those we recognize anyway – seem to lean towards remain but we like the comment from a Church of Scotland minister. He says ‘the EU is not perfect, but has replaced bombs with bureaucrats’. Several of us were on the receiving end of bombs during WW2 but the bureaucrats have had more impact on our lives.

    The ban on Russian athletes competing in the Rio games has finally been confirmed. The decision received a predictable response from Vladimir Putin – ‘unjust and unfair’ he says. He makes a good point that ‘responsibility should always be personified – if some members of your family have committed a crime you can’t hold all the family responsible’. Perhaps he needs to make a real example of the coaches and scientists that colluded with those that used performance-enhancing drugs. It might just get the decision reversed.

    The sad murder of MP Jo Cox has sent a shock wave around the country. The media is awash with suggestions that her killer is a right wing extremist, though information about his background suggests instability rather than extremism. A number of MP’s are now talking about increased protection since they receive regular threats. Most of these ‘threats’ come via social media and it raises another conundrum. Perhaps more action should be taken against trolls. Identified and arrested it would give the police a chance to assess these people. Are they a real danger or just insecure nonentities that have a voice that would be unheard if social media didn’t exist?

    Monday 20^th June – David Cameron got a mauling in a live TV debate on the referendum last night. Inevitably, the topic was immigration. He likened himself to Churchill in his willingness to fight for the UK within Europe and got jeered for even mentioning himself in the same sentence as Winnie. The debate was in Milton Keynes and with last year’s net immigration of 333,000 he was on a hiding to nothing. The population of Milton Keynes is about 250,000 and even those who can’t add up know that you can’t house a greater number every year than currently live there, even by concreting over the rapidly contracting green belt.

    We can think of few areas in which we would say Canada leads the world but they took a big step last week. They adopted a controversial law that allows physicians to legally help people close to death to end their suffering. Some senators and campaigners wanted to add those with degenerative diseases but the government decided against that. But at least they have a start. We have seen good friends suffer in no hope situations and applaud the decision.

    Tuesday 21^st June – it’s rumoured that Anne Robinson has been spotted filming in London today dressed in a burqa. The 71-year olds burqa looks black with orange trim in the pictures, though the orange colour may just be visible skin. The confrontational lady is alleged to have been under the knife more often than a chateaubriand, so if it was Anne, and it could have been anybody, we recommend she wears the dress more often. She looks good in it!

    Friday 10^th June - if you want opinions on any imaginable topic, join a shipload of pensioners. ‘Remain’ or ‘Leave’ seemed to be on everyone’s lips and we need facts is the general cry from the public. “We stuck it up the French in 1815 and the Germans in 1918 and 1945. Who needs them?” Said with total disdain by an elderly gent, historically date perfect, definitely factual. Who can argue with that?

    A couple of our old gits have renewed their wedding vows while enjoying a cruise and we met Elaine Coles on our just completed trip. Elaine is an independent celebrant who organizes and manages what should be memorable highlights in our lives. In a world where people are inclined to tailor these personal moments, Elaine’s knowledge and experience can deliver the perfect package. Her view, ‘why not make a special event, very special’. Her website www.ukceremonies.com is well worth a look if something big is looming in your life.

    Saturday 11^th June – The Amrita, Japan’s first ‘naked restaurant’ isn’t quite what it claims since diners will be forced to wear paper underwear. And that’s not the only rule. Over 60’s are banned presumably since paper underwear may not be enough to protect the seats from unplanned leaks! They have also banned ‘fatties’, defined as 15kg above the average weight for their height; also those with tattoos. Guests will also be asked not to cause a nuisance by making uninvited small talk, though the paper underwear will make small pure guesswork. We’re not sure The Amrita will be as popular as London’s naked restaurant, The Bunyadi, which currently has a waiting list of over 20,000 for a table. Fortunately they don’t ban over 60’s since some youngsters will be retired by the time they get a reservation!

    Sunday 12^th June – a Polish man failed to turn up at York Magistrates Court to answer a charge of drunk driving. His reason was a cracker – too fat. He weighs over 14 stone and has mobility problems. The police arrested him and delivered him to the court. He now views the police as a taxi service. We suggest his next court appearance is in Warsaw.

    Monday 13^th June – Gordon Brown appeared on the radio this morning to tell us why we should vote ‘Remain’. Needless to say he has a plan. We don’t hear much from him these days – perhaps there is a God – then back he comes in his ‘save the world guise’. First we had Blair and Major, now the man who wrecked final salary pensions after selling our gold reserves at boot sale prices. Why can’t these failed Prime Ministers fade quietly into obscurity instead of raising our blood pressure by making us shout abuse at an inanimate radio?

    Men with spare rooms are placing interesting ads on Craigslist and Gumtree. Questions like what favours would women give for free accommodation, cooking, housework and sex as examples. So far the blokes in question have been missing a trick. They should be insisting on a one month trial period!     

    We missed the first Chris Evans Top Gear but caught last nights. Not sure if the loud noises were cars or the Clarkson team laughing. Evans threw up during the programme but I managed to keep my Sunday lunch in situ – with difficulty. Comparisons with the original are pointless since the gap is too great – think £5 red plonk versus Chateau Margaux 2009. Goodbye Top Gear, lighter than light.

    Tuesday 14^th June – I’ve been stung by an ant but never been bitten by an elephant. It’s the little things that get you! So it is with the EU. New washing machines now take about 3 hours to do a common programme. Why? Because EU law insists they are ECO friendly. No more quick washes if you have to replace your old machine. So what’s next? Well, the EU is keen to make kettles and toasters ECO friendly so it will take twice as long to make a coffee and a slice of toast. But they’ve held back the introduction of that law. I wonder why? Could it be that 30% of kettles and toasters are bought in the UK and we have a pesky referendum on the horizon?

    ‘Gender neutral’ policies have been introduced at 80 UK schools in response to diversity campaigners who warn about discrimination against LGBT pupils. We doubt many primary school pupils know the meaning of LGBT so confusion will reign. ‘Dress Down’ Fridays at the office will get interesting as this type of policy spreads.