NICE, our National Institute for Health and Care Excellence, generally get headlines for rejecting new treatments for niche cancers, return on investment their usual reason.  A tough decision, particularly if you happen to be the patient or family of, that sees extra months of life disappear.  They have now excelled themselves.  Their latest guidance to be published is how to tackle obesity.  The advice, eat less and take exercise, must have involved hours of research, a multitude of meetings and significant cost.  Firing the people who allowed it to be published might free up funds to give some poor soul a few more months with their loved ones.

    The French have always made it a point of honour to resist the addition of English words to their language, which has been protected by the Académie Française since 1635.  Common words, like the universal email has become ‘courriel’ in France. This is unlike the Brits, who have absorbed numerous French words into everyday use.  Is it about to change?  Fleur Pellerin, the French Culture Minister, suggests that words from other languages could enrich la culture française.  Touché madame ministre!

    A wedding collapsed in the village of Uttar Pradesh in India when the groom failed a simple maths test.  The family of the bride didn’t believe the grooms claims to be an educated man.  They tested him in the marriage hall by asking him to add 15 and 6.  His answer of 17 stopped the marriage in its tracks.  Friends of the groom insist he is educated and mumbled something about the bride should not have lifted her veil before he was asked to do the sum!   

    Sales at Dignitas in Switzerland have grown by 25% during the last year.  Forecasts suggest it will grow even more as our election campaign drags on.  We fear that Dignitas may not cope with demand when the politicians begin their televised debates.  A great many people we know are already giving up the will to live as they hear how wonderful life will be if we vote in a particular way.  I’ll borrow a French word for what exits our politician’s mouths – merde.

    Teenagers that are trying to reach and join IS in Syria are continuing to occupy our police and security services.  If a similar effort had been applied to stop the abuse of children in Rochdale, Oxford and how many more locations, the stories we now read may have been avoided.  We can only hope that similar effort will be made to stop the return of ‘fighters’ from Syria if the war turns against them.  They are not victims.

    Is it coincidence that Hilary Clinton’s silhouette on the cover of Time Magazine shows her with horns?  The magazine editors insist it is. Really? Ah well, call me a cynic then. Never fear Hilary, you’re in great company.  Vladimir Putin, Barack Obama, Margaret Thatcher, Pope Francis and even Jesus Christ have had similar treatment and it didn’t seem to hold them back! 

    One of our favourites, Valérie Trierweiler, is back in the news for allegedly giving a slap to a café owner. She may now be forced to undergo a psychiatric assessment as a result of the ‘attack’.  By our reckoning, dumping Hollande should be proof that the lady is of perfectly sound mind.  French voters will do the same thing at the first opportunity.

    Getting a red card has moved on from soccer and rugby.  Broomfield Hospital in Essex is now using a colour card system to identify the seriousness of patient conditions in A&E.  It seemed a good idea, to ensure that patients with the greatest needs are seen as quickly as possible, until a few words were added to the card to identify the condition that had to be treated.  A broken arm or leg would be treated with sympathy, but how would people react if they saw bleeding piles on your card.  And we’re not sure what few words would be used to describe a mishap with a sex toy, battery change perhaps!

    A smiling Vladimir Putin reappeared yesterday after a few days on the missing list.  His first task was to mobilize Russia’s Northern Fleet to combat readiness.  The size of the mobilization dwarfs the NATO exercise off Scotland.  His message seems clear.  Mines bigger than yours lads. Next!