Black Friday, imported from the USA, lived up to its name as shoppers ran amok, fighting for so called bargains, in most of our major cities.  So much for austerity! Cyber Monday is still to come but shoppers can't get physical on a PC, though it might be a good idea to avoid Internet cafes!   Jez can generally be relied on to raise our spirits and he hasn't let us down.  He called to ask what 'Cider Monday" is?  We're still working out the details of the story we plan to spin.

    Thank heavens for an MP with a sense of humour.  Penny Mordaunt, Communities Minister and Naval Reservist, attended a dinner with Marine Training Officers at the end of a course and got lumbered with a forfeit by other diners.  As a result she made a speech on hen and cock welfare during the Easter Adjournment Debate, managing to insert the word cock six times, only coming clean about what she did last week.  Some MP's have accused her of trivialising parliament.   We assume they are among the group who hiss, boo and barrack during Prime Minister's question time.  And we’re not sure how can they complain after the cock and bull most of them spout.  Stern faced members say that parliament should never be treated as a joke.  If they’re serious, most of them should resign their seats or as a minimum action, never utter another word in The House. 

    This year’s adult Christmas present seems likely to be the Ouija board manufactured by Hasbro.  Google reports them flying off the shelves – an omen if ever we heard one!  We can blame Hollywood and its new horror film entitled Ouija.  The film has been panned by the critics but has clearly prompted interest by those who’ve seen or heard about it.  It minded us of the sixties when the occult almost became a right of passage for late twenty odds.  In our day we used a stemmed wine glass surrounded by the letters of the alphabet, on a polished table.  The stem was aimed at stopping individuals pushing the glass towards letters and it worked.  With one finger on the bottom of a stemmed glass you can only push in one direction.  Our little octet ended most Friday nights seated around the glass posing the question, “is there anyone there”, generally accompanied by laughter.  We did it for many weeks, accusing various members of pushing the glass whenever any movement occurred.  Then it happened.  One night the glass moved rapidly around the letters and spelled out a woman’s name.  It shocked one of the girls who knew an elderly lady of that name.  Had she died was the obvious question?  No comment, but we never used our makeshift Ouija board again.  Should we believe in the supernatural? I’m unsure, but believe that there are elements of our world (if it is ours) that we don’t understand.  Not that we can see a downside to owning a Ouija board, unless ownership reverts and it begins to own you.  The difficulty is recognition of the change when, perhaps if, it occurs.

    When will Madonna mature? At 56 she’s let it all hang out again for Interview Magazine.  The best comment I saw was that ‘she has pushed the envelope’, a modern saying, the meaning of which defeats me.  Having looked at the pictures (only for the sake of the blog), I saw several folds of flesh that looked remarkably like envelopes.  There was plenty of room for a stamp as well.

    Tony and Cherie Blair seem determined to give us a laugh for Christmas.  Their Seasons Greetings card is the funniest thing I’ve seen for years. We can’t believe he didn’t have several taken and have to assume this was the best one.  The others will fetch good money on Ebay. If we didn’t know better, we could easily assume Cherie had killed him and had him stuffed.  Come to think of it, Christmas is a time for turkeys!  RIP Chilcot.

    George Osborne will be making his autumn statement later today.  It goes without saying that he’ll be singing from a positive hymn sheet while Ed balls sings the negative descant.  Both will be using figures that are disputable.  One point we often discuss in the pub is that nothing happens in business until somebody sells something.  With no growth in Europe, our major market, and a slowing in China, it’s a surprise that the UK economy is growing at all.  But jobs growth is all in low paid employment with tax receipts to match.  To change the mix we need Europe to get its act together.  Anyone seen any flying pigs?